No Paycheck Fridays: You Can Still Look Good

Okay, first of all, I have regained my composure, and I am now getting to the portion of our programming where I let go of what I cannot accomplish, I but what I cannot find time or will to make, and I feel silly for being all woe is me.

So there's that.

Second of all, I spent most of the afternoon driving to get to an anticlimactic 15-minute interview. I braved the elements (raining emus and ostriches today) and drove about 40 minutes each way to see a lady about a job. It went kind of meh, sort of okay, rather ho-hum, and a host of other lackluster descriptions. BUT!

I looked really pretty.

And every day I look really pretty. Because I put a little effort in. And I find that it makes me feel lots better, and far more human than that feeling you get when your significant other comes home, takes one look at you and says "Kitty cat pajama pants...still? Okaaaaay." Time slips by so fast when you've nowhere to be. But I have found that it's much better if I get up when I used to get up, and I shower, put on Real Clothes, and do my face up. I thought like it was time to stop looking like I felt.

So, i don't want to sound all infomercial-ish. I am not getting anything out of what I am about to tell you. I am simply saying this because it really, truly, has made a difference in how I see myself (literally and figuratively) and I think it's awesome, and you will too. If you like awesome makeup, that is.

Give Sweet Libertine a try! Really! Here's why: First of all, it's handmade makeup. Handmade = great. It's mineral makeup. That means that if you are Sensitive Skinned and your eyes feel all itchy and yucky when you wear eyeshadow, you can probably get away with wearing this stuff. It doesn't have all the ick-o chemicals in it that the store bought crap does, and it turns out that those ick-o things are the very things that make my skin feel itchy and burny. It's handmade mineral makeup made by a one-woman show. If I need to tell you why this is an worth supporting, then you are just a Lost Cause. It's handmade mineral makeup made by a one-woman show that is affordable. You get a lot for a little. Do you know how cool that is when you are a person with not a lot to spend on things like eyeshadow? It's super cool. I got my Retail Therapy Allowance package in the mail today, and I am very pleased. It arrived quickly, looks awesome, and didn't break my bank. And y'all- these days everyone banks are pretty fragile, no? And the colors are pretty much magical. Dragonfly, Thai Silk, Feral, Boombox- how the hell can you go wrong? You totally can't, that's how.

Anyway, it's not too late to snag some gift certificates, some sparklies for yourself (the better to look hot while ringing in 2010, yes?), or start making your wish list for when you do land that Next Big thing.

I realize that I am sort of getting kind of commercial-y here, so I will cut it short and say that I think this makeup is very rad, it's a little thing that goes a long way in making a gal feel good, and I wanted you to know about it. Cool?

Now get back to your frantic crafting, wrapping, or smug Ignoring of A Holiday Which You Are Not Into.

No Paycheck Fridays: Junk Food Is My Frenemy

Frenemy: Someone who is both friend and enemy, a relationship that is both mutually beneficial or dependent while being competitive, fraught with risk and mistrust. (From urbandictionary.com)

Yes, this is sort of the worst time of the year to be of the Jobless Variety. Not because of gifts and all that crap, but because there is delicious junk food EVERYWHERE. Homemade, store bought, you name it. It's there. It has sprinkles. And it knows you are weak.

Like a lot of other people I eat when I am depressed. I eat when I am sad, lonely, afraid, anxious, happy, bored, you name it. And carrots are not comfort food last time I checked.

So, I have learned something about myself physically here lately, and it's a good thing for anyone to remember during hard times: garbage in, garbage out. A little ice cream can soothe the soul, but once you get in the double digit range for Christmas cookies in one day, it's hard to beat the streets looking for the Next Big Thing when your pants are too tight. It's much, much easier to just take a nap and try again tomorrow. Only if you do take that nap, how many people aren't napping, and are instead snatching up the few opportunities out there? Long story short, you (I) can't give into temptation and stuff your (my) face. It's self defeating, and hey- it's not like you have the money for new pants right now anyway, am i right?

The other thing: Job Loss is like grieving. I know this because I am at the Anger stage. I have expertly placed the blame for this squarely where it belongs, and now I. Am. Pissed. The best thing to get over Well-Placed Anger is to punch the offender square in the nose. You can't do that though. Because if you do, you will go to jail, and then you will have to spend your Gubberment Cheese on bail! And that would be terrible! Because you would have no money left for the cookies that you shouldn't be buying but are anyway because they are delicious and you don't know what I am going through so just give me the damn cookies and stop judging me already!!!

Ahem.

Yes, anger. See? See what it does to a person? That's why you have to Move Your Ass. Regularly. And with enthusiasm. I thought long and hard about deferring my gym membership in the interest of Cutting Back. But you know what? No. I will not. Why? Because going to Spinning Class helps take the stabby feelings away. Weight lifting is good too. You can't punch people in the nose if you are too tired to lift your arms. Besides, you know that you are still eating those cookies anyway. And we have already visited the issue of having the means to buy new pants.

So in short: get off the computer and go move your butt already. And put down those damn cookies. Or better yet, just give them to me; I will hang on to them for you. Especially those ones over there, the ones with sprinkles.

Have a great weekend! I am in full crafty manic panicked swing over here. Hopefully I will come back Monday with lots of hastily cobbled together goodness to share.

No Paycheck Fridays: Some Reading For You

Okay so:

I realize that I am relatively new to this whole Not So Very Employed thing. However, I have given this a lot of thought. Obsessed over it, if we are being honest here. And I have decided a few things.

• I will soldier on and have the Merriest of Holidays, and there's nothingyoucandoabouddit!
• I will continue to laugh at this. Sometimes maniacally.
  
• I am smart and sometimes downright ingenious when I need to be. I forecast needing to channel MacGuyver in the near future.
  
• I am not alone. As such, I feel obligated to share with you what I learn and know to be true. It's my way of paying you back, because you know- if we go out for dinner or something you are totally paying. Suckling upon the government teat and all.
  
• I hate the word teat.
  

So, first I would like to mention some Reading For The Unemployed. Or reading for the Employed Who Like To Laugh. Whichever. Read Bitter is The New Black by Jen Lancaster. Or, pass it along to a friend. I got it this summer from my local library. It's full of awesome. I don't recommend it as a holiday gift, because I think that it would be filed along with other Unintentionally Insulting gifts, like giving a chubby college girl lots of work out clothing and a pilates set (I'm looking at YOU, Mom!), or wrinkle cream to...any woman. Still- the book is hilariously funny, and there is a good deal of Schadenfreude for those of you into that sort of thing. I totally am, so it was wonderful reading along as a very materialistic bitch got her comeuppance. She is so lovably terrible that by the end of the book I would have had her over for a bowl of Ramen Noodles and a walk around the block with the dogs. I'd even let her walk Maya (Lilly is strong as an ox, and it takes a Herculean effort to get her to act like she has a lick of sense on walks.).

And then, once you love her as much as I do, you can toddle on over to www.Jennsylvania.com and read her blog, which is also hilarious. I find her so funny that I forgive her for her obsession with Twilight.