Frankenloo & HVAC Girl

Let's talk about the past 24 hours. then let's talk about an epiphany of sorts, and we will conclude with why animals are horrid and merciless with the way they harangue you into loving them.

And so it begins...

Lilly came home from surgery disturbingly out of it. Moving around was such an effort. She was in so much pain. She got a pain pill, she went to sleep. BF is racked with guilt and is angry with me for putting her through this. I begin to doubt whether or not it is right, despite my fervent conviction that unless we are willing to keep every single offspring of our animals, they should be Spayed.

Well then, it occurs to us that Maya is outside in the rain. Except she's not. Turns out that she moved a mound of bricks and got under the house via the crawlspace. So BF decides to go in after her, so he can start repairing the damage to the deck. And then he sees it:

she has destroyed a roughly 25 foot length of AC duct silvery tubey stuff. Destroyed. And shat upon. Seriously, there are tons of dumps under there. I could have killed her on the spot, had I not had to sit there and wait for her to be dragged out from under the house. I felt my knees get all wobbly, my blood ran cold, and in my mind, mentally thousands of dollars would have to be put forth RIGHT FECKING NOW to make this right. It did not help that BF was ranting and speculating that we would be sued over this.

so I did what any sane person would do, and that's throw on their shoes and speed to Lowe's as fast as they could to see what sort of DIY duct job they can do. Turns out, for about $50, they can make it like it never happened. I have spoken to a few people who have done this before, and it is simply a matter of taking down the shredded duct, and taping up the new one. Crawling around and cleaning up dog shit- not so glamorous, but can be done at the same time. Oh and here's something fun" Turns out, no one uses duct tape for ducts anymore. They use this metal foil tape. Guess who has a whole roll of it from her Mixed Media Days? Me!!! This is twice in the last month that Craft Supply Hoarding has paid off, folks. Twice.

So the Duct Panic wore off, and I got to thinking. I thought about how competent I will feel when I can say that I replaced that stuff, and did it On My Own, and how I was almost getting excited about it. And then I realized that it was the same feeling I get when I say "I need a hat; I will make one. I need a pillow that looks good in the living room; I will make one." And I think that I figured out the root of why I am a Habitual Tryer. Because I need to do things so that I know that I can do them. Some things I really like to do, and so I will do them again. Some things, once is enough (I believe duct repairs will fall in that category.) But that's okay. I think that the motivations don't really matter; the outcome, the joy that comes from Making Something- it's always the same.

so there's that, and it should be where the story ends, but it isn't.

So Lilly gets worse. she starts some wheezing; she doesn't eat or drink. she wheezes and moans her way through the night, and I wake up ragged this morning. Then we head to the vet after they say that they want to check out her wheezing. so I come home from work, and she is like all Doom and Gloom, woe is Lilly. We ride in the car, where she shivers, moans, and cries the whole way. At this point I am scared, and just wracked with guilt that I have done this to this poor dog. Yeah, she pisses me off, but are ovaries a fair trade for stepping on my feet all the time? I dunno. So anyway, have you ever had a car that made a funny noise, and you took it to a Mechanic, and it ran beautifully for the Mechanic? Lilly is that car.

She hopped out of the car, tail wagging, and marched right into the vet's, demanding to be loved upon. She tried to make out with the vet. The vet listened and listened to her, endured being kissed on the mouth (YUCK!) and said that she had a bit of an upper respiratory thing going on, and good thing we brought her in- it could have become pneumonia. So, after devouring an entire can of dog food, and then trying to dig in the trash, Lilly succeeded in almost making me look like a total idiot.

And since then we have been home, where all appears to be back on track. And then I lay down in the guest bed with this
and get up after a while, when i hear lilly heave a big sigh and see this
Lilly resting, and Maya snuggled in very close, and watching to make sure no one bothers her.

and that, my dears, is how they both avoided being shipped to Nicaragua in a box with no air holes.