Proof That the Economy Sucks

Folks, this is the face of unemployment. Maya, who did not even earn a living wage, lost her job today.

What made her expendable when she wasn't even being paid?

She smells like a dog.

Before you recoil in horror, let me say this: I don't tolerate a house that smells like animal. The kitty box is regularly scooped, and the poop is taken out. The dog gets baths so regularly that as soon as her collar is taken off, she jumps into the tub unassisted and waits to be washed. Being towel dried is a high point in her day. Anyway, I see to it that she smells like shampoo as much as I can. Her bedding is washed, her nails trimmed, and her ears cleaned. I figure if I am going to take her every where with me she has to be presentable.

this is why i am so confused as to why she was fired today. I certainly didn't notice the smell. Matter of fact, she smells a hundred times better than the AC guy, and we pay him (quite a bit) to not fix anything. Anyway, she didn't get a politely worded warning, no one held a seminar on hygiene hoping she'd get the hint- she just got the axe. Canned. Pink slip. Fired.

Okay now, let's be serious.

I am pretty hurt by this. I work in an office composed of three people and (formerly) one dog. We have all worked there a minimum of three years. I would think that we all know each other fairly well, and can anticipate one another's reactions. Therefore, I can't imagine anyone visualizing an encounter in which they tell me my dog smells bad, and me reacting any other way than apologizing profusely, and returning the next day with all manner of cleaners, sprays, colognes, disinfectants, and what not. I would have that doggie smelling like a flower bouquet that was dried in the sunshine on a cool summer breeze in an alpine forest of berry splendor, seriously!

If her snoring, the occasional rogue fart (I admit those don't smell nice), or the odd toenail biting was unbearable, why not just state the totally obvious and plausible? Why not just say, "Hey! We just realized this is an office! No dogs allowed in offices, silly!" Why get so personal, without even giving her a chance to improve?

This is a terrible time to be job hunting, even for a dog who was bred for, well...hunting. She has no real skills to speak of, her education consists of an associates' degree in obedience from PetSmart, and she got fired from her first job ever for smelling like a dog.

I hope she gets unemployment benefits.